Finally then, brethren, we urge and exhort in the Lord Jesus that you should abound more and more, just as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God; for you know what commandments we gave you through the Lord Jesus. For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one should take advantage of and defraud his brother in this matter, because the Lord is the avenger of all such, as we also forewarned you and testified. For God did not call us to uncleanness, but in holiness. Therefore he who rejects this does not reject man, but God, who has also given us His Holy Spirit.
(1 Thessalonians 4:1-8)
In our third article in this sexual purity series, we want to draw out two more crucial points from our text: first that we need to control our bodies based on a knowledge of ourselves, and second that we need to use our brethren to hold us sexually accountable.
Our first point comes from verse four where Paul says, “that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor.” What he’s essentially saying is that we should not let our bodies control us. Breaking down this verse this is what Paul says:
“each of you” You are personally responsible for yourself. No one can do this for you.
“should know” That Greek verb is often used in reference to knowing how to do something, that is having the knowledge and skill to accomplish a desired goal.
“how to possess” This means “to gain mastery over; to control.” And what are you to control?
“his own vessel” This means your body. And why?
“in sanctification and honor” You control your body to the honor and glory of God.
The key in this verse is the idea of knowing ourselves. We should study our habits and tendencies. Everyone is different. Some things are universal problems, but you may be particularly weak in some particular areas and need to take extra precautions. If you are a careful student of yourself, you’ll know exactly what to avoid.
Our second point comes from the very first verse: “Finally then, brethren, we urge and exhort in the Lord Jesus…” Paul is holding us accountable, and this is a pattern we should follow. Three important things here:
“brethren” We are family. We help each other with sin because we’re brothers and sisters in Christ. This is not some extraordinary thing. This kind of service should be considered very ordinary, even expected. This is what you do in a family.
“we urge and exhort” We consider this a priority. Of all the services we can provide for each other, none is more important than this. These verbs are essentially the same, and the repetition lets you know how important this is.
“in the Lord Jesus” Holding others accountable should never be done in a haughty or a highhanded way, but rather as humble servants of Christ who only want to encourage faithfulness to the Lord. It should never be about us. It is always to be done in the Lord.
So there is something you must do and something others must do to help. You are responsible to know yourself and to take steps to control your desires. But your brethren have a role to play as well.
If you are really struggling with purity (pornography, extramarital relationships, etc.) let me “urge and exhort” you to do two things:
First meditate upon and pray about your problem areas (Philippians 1:9-11). What are the most common ways the Devil assaults your eyes, your mind, and your heart?
1)Write down the top five weaknesses you have and prioritize them. Ask God for discernment, for forgiveness, for deliverance, and for strength to eliminate these temptations.
2)Next find a brother or sister you trust to whom you can confess these weaknesses (James 5:16). Pray together. Devise accountability strategies. If the Internet is the problem you can use a website like covenanteyes.com which will give your accountability partner a list of all the websites you visit each day.
You’re not alone. Many fail often and struggle silently in this area. Don’t fight this by yourself! We’re your family! We love you! Let us help!
~by David Maxson